In our journey through life, one of the most common struggles we face is the uncertainty of knowing what we truly want. We’re chasing our tails, finding ourselves in a state of confusion, unsure of our own desires and aspirations exclusive of someone else’s wants and needs. This same lack of clarity can stunt our personal growth and prevent us from living a fulfilling life; one that feels good and aligned. At least, that’s been my observation. Let’s dive in and explore the importance of knowing what you want, I’ll give you five tools to help you get the clarity you need and discover your true desires.
I've personally experienced the struggle of knowing what I wanted over the years, and recently, I've been meeting with several women, asking them a simple question: "What is it that you want?" And you know what the most common answer is? “Ion know!”
And listen, it's okay not to know, but what's not okay is staying on repeat in that "I don't know" state for months, years, or even decades, while you prioritize everyone else's life over your own.
Many people find it challenging to identify their true values because they have someone else's voice stuck in their head. The minute you start to insert somebody else's ideas, opinions, thoughts, standards, expectations into what it is that you want, it stops becoming what you want. And then you get confused because you wanna make people happy, but you also want things for yourself too. Trying to navigate and manage all that poses a challenge.
You don't know what you want because you're trying to satisfy this person, that person… you don't want that person mad at you, and then everything that you want gets muted underneath everybody else's stuff. Realize that some of the cloudiness of not knowing what you want could be culturally or socially influenced and will hinder your self-awareness.
So while you're paying attention to what everybody else needs and wants (and not what you want) you end up dissatisfied and stuck in indecision not knowing how to get out of that uncertainty.
We often forget that as humans, we're meant to evolve, change, and grow. We're meant to leave behind the old and embrace the new. But if we're not clear on what that ‘new’ is, we emit a frequency and vibration of uncertainty into the Universe. And guess what? The Universe reflects that back to us, leaving us more stuck, more confused, and no clearer than when we started. That's why, before embarking on any self-improvement journey, it's crucial to understand what we want. We need to know our intentions; otherwise, we'll wander aimlessly without direction. We don't want to be guided solely by someone else's voice in our heads, telling us which way to go, and twisting in the wind. We need to get clear because whether we are clear or not, it will inform our decision-making. Clarity = better decision-making.
You see, we can either make choices based on our own intuition, desires, and soul's calling, or we can make decisions based on what others want us to do. And let me tell you, that's not why you're here. You're not here to be on someone else's agenda or live in their shadow. You're here to discover and embrace your own path of betterment, improvement, and growth.
So, Soul Tribe, let's commit to gaining some clarity and more of it, please. Let's uncover our true desires and set our own intentions. Only then can we embark on a journey that aligns with our authentic selves. It's time to step out of the cloud of confusion, embrace our power, and define our own destinies. Peep the 5 tools below…
The first tool to find clarity is self-reflection. This requires taking the time to sit with yourself, delve deep into your thoughts and emotions, and understand what truly resonates with your heart. Mindfulness meditation can be a powerful tool in cultivating self-awareness. By observing your thoughts, feelings, and bodily sensations, you can gain insights into your own inner experiences and patterns. Additionally, journaling provides a safe space for self-expression and helps uncover hidden desires and motivations. Through self-reflection, you can identify what brings you joy, what activities make you lose track of time, and what truly matters to you.
2. Embracing Curiosity
Embracing curiosity is the second tool to finding clarity. Curiosity is an innate quality that sparks exploration and self-discovery. By nurturing your curiosity, you can explore new experiences, hobbies, and interests. It's essential to maintain a sense of wonder and ask questions about the world around you. Like a child, embrace the joy of curiosity and let it guide you towards uncovering new desires and aspirations. Just be curious and open to learning something new.
3. Avoiding External Influences
In our quest to know what we want, it's crucial to separate our desires from external influences. Often, societal expectations, cultural norms, and the opinions of others can cloud our judgment and make it difficult to discern our true desires. It's important to unbury your own voice from the layers of other people's expectations and beliefs. By recognizing and acknowledging these external influences, you can start to prioritize your own needs and wants, free from the constraints of societal, familial, or cultural pressures.
4. Trusting Your Intuition
Trusting your intuition is vital when seeking clarity. Your intuition is the inner voice that guides you towards what feels right and is authentic. While seeking feedback from trusted friends, family, or mentors can provide valuable insights, it's essential to rely on your own inner guidance. Before seeking external advice, take a moment to connect with your intuition and ask yourself what feels right. Give yourself space and time to receive the answers from within. Trust that you have the wisdom and capability to make sound decisions for your own life.
5. Body Awareness Practices
Engaging in body awareness practices is another effective way to gain clarity. Activities such as yoga, tai chi, and breathwork help you connect with your physical sensations and emotions. Tuning into your body can offer valuable signals and clues about what is right for you. Pay attention to energy shifts, emotional states, and sensations in your body. By becoming attuned to your body's responses, you can align your actions and choices with your true desires.
Finding clarity and knowing what you truly want in life is a transformative journey. It requires self-reflection, embracing curiosity, detaching from external influences, trusting your intuition, and practicing body awareness. By implementing these tools, you can uncover your authentic desires and aspirations. Remember, this process takes time, patience, and consistent practice. Embrace the exploration of self-discovery and create the life you truly desire. You have the power to shape your own destiny and live a life aligned with your heart's desires. Now go find out what that is.